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April 30, 2015 Commentary 0 comments

Miscommunication Between The Sexes

One of the main reasons I wrote my first project “They Don’t Want You To Win” was because there’s a terrible lack of understanding between men and women. One feels they’re owed everything and another feels they don’t have to work much. These qualities are interchangeable amongst the sexes and you have both sides trying to give their form of “advice”, which happens to make things worse. You have unqualified people trying to qualify your life and tell you what worked for them in hopes it works for you. It seems these days they don’t even care what happens to the people listening to the advice in the first place and just want to line pockets.

Men are often told to do things the way women will instruct them to, but women themselves won’t even adhere to the standards they set. Men are often told to be aggressive in their pursuits, and that “it’s a number game” and that they should do what they want, regardless of the consequences. Oddly enough, besides idiot guys telling men to do it, it’s starting to come from women as well. Sabotage!

I don’t aim to steer anyone to confusion. I won’t, for that matter.

The best way to clear the confusion between the sexes would be to stop letting your actions be guided by what the other sex thinks they would want. If you want to buy her flowers, do so because she actually said she loves them, not because you saw it in a movie. If you want to run her feet, do so because she actually asked for it, or better yet, she offered to rub yours. Ladies, if you’re not interested or if you are interested in someone, let them know. Don’t doddle or hold someone’s admiration captive. People will resent you for it. Same thing for men as well. There are genuine women out there who have been hurt by a man who wasn’t forthright.

Everyone should state clear intentions from the get-go. If you getting intimate, talk about what boundaries/expectations are and live up to them. With honesty and knowing what’s what, there is no questions, no mysteries, and more importantly, no headaches.

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ben moss

Hi, I am Adam photographer based in NY City. I am fortunate to be able to spend a good amount of time on personal projects, traveling and collaborating with great people.

       

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